I knew he was loony, but "loony" doesn't do him justice!
Straits!
I could hack your head off, rip it with the Ripple, or strike it with sunlight!
Pick your poison, because one of them has to hurt less than the other two!
T-The crazy gunman's in the café!
Somebody, save us!
He'll kill us all!
Jojo, what were you...!
What have you done?!
Well at a glance,
it looks like I'll be working my whole life to pay back Irene's.
Don't be a dope!
You killed that man!
What "man?"
You mean Straits?
Now what happened here?
These bullets here all appear to have been bent.
Smokey, make like a banana and split!
In all honesty, I hope he was still a "man,"
because if he was, I would only end up in Alcatraz for murdering the cur.
Y-You mean he wasn't?!
Shush up, sisters!
The echoes of your screams irk me ears!
Beat it, before I French your face!
Shijima no soko kara
Once, four folks from the fires of Hell
Shijima no soko kara
Once, four folks from the fires of Hell
mezameru sono hashiratachi toki wo koe
awoke from their pillars after eons of eternal slumber.
mezameru sono hashiratachi toki wo koe
awoke from their pillars after eons of eternal slumber.
Shinku no chishio ga
Their ambition for power assembled
Shinku no chishio ga
Their ambition for power assembled
tachiagaru yuuki wo hikiawaseru
the blood of a few bombastic braves.
tachiagaru yuuki wo hikiawaseru
the blood of a few bombastic braves.
Uketsugu ai wo sadame to yobu nara
But one brave, whose fate was bound in his blood,
Uketsugu ai wo sadame to yobu nara
But one brave, whose fate was bound in his blood,
hohoemu me de tsugi no te wo
shot a sly smirk at his destined demise.
hohoemu me de tsugi no te wo
shot a sly smirk at his destined demise.
Yami wo azamuite setsuna wo kawashite
He would deceive the darkness and dodge the danger!
Yami wo azamuite setsuna wo kawashite
He would deceive the darkness and dodge the danger!
Yaiba surinuke yatsura no suki wo tsuke
He would exploit the flaws of the foes he faced!
Yaiba surinuke yatsura no suki wo tsuke
He would exploit the flaws of the foes he faced!
Tsuranuita omoi ga mirai wo hiraku
And his memory would live on for all posterity!
Tsuranuita omoi ga mirai wo hiraku
And his memory would live on for all posterity!
He's like a bloody storm!
Atsuku like a bloody storm
Blazing bloody into a storm,
Atsuku like a bloody storm
Blazing bloody into a storm,
ketsumyaku ni kizamareta innen ni
but would he be free of the cursed fate of his family?
ketsumyaku ni kizamareta innen ni
but would he be free of the cursed fate of his family?
Ukiagaru kienai hokori no kizuna
Who can say, but the bonds of these braves
Ukiagaru kienai hokori no kizuna
Who can say, but the bonds of these braves
nigirishimete
will never be buried.
nigirishimete
will never be buried.
Episode
The Wizard
G-Great Scott!
Vampires are vigorous!
Dio's downfall
stemmed from poor prioritization.
He prioritized experimenting with his powers at his own leisure,
rather than killing Jonathan, who ultimately ended his existence.
But I won't allow history to repeat itself!
I can experiment all I want with my powers after I've killed you.
And I will kill you,
with the final technique Dio used against your grandfather!
Empty, are you?
I'll empty your skull with my highly-pressurized blood beams,
which I call "Strait's Bloody Streams!"
Die, Joseph!
Jojo!
Arrogance was your undoing.
And now, only Erina Joestar remains.
Killing her is...
And now, you'll say,
like taking candy from a baby.
"like taking candy from a baby."
Next, you'll ask,
"how could he still be alive with that hole in his skull?"
How could he still be alive with that hole in his skull?!
Well Straits,
if only you would've left your isolated temple in Tibet and seen the world,
you might've actually learned something new.
You could've killed me if you'd only been more attentive.
Take a good gander at the face on this clock!
Nanna Erina told me about how those beams were to blame for Grandpappy's demise!
It was a mirror?!
A bit slow on the uptake, aren't we?
Straits!
I've heard that the Ripple mimics the effect of sunlight on vampires!
Enjoy this!
I'll zap you to bits with this jolt!
Now,
Ripple energy supposedly melts the visage of vampires,
so let's have a look-see.
Y-You're not melting!
You're not even dying, are you?!
I suppose Nanna Erina forgot a detail or two!
Unlikely.
But I was right to assume that you would become a great threat to my existence.
I'll let you in on my secret.
This muffler was hand-knit from the dried microscopic bowels of 30,000 Satypolasia beetles,
a species of beetles indigenous to Southeast Asia.
This material conducts and disperses Ripple energy quicker than it does the human body,
effectively neutralizing the Ripple.
You could consider this muffler akin to a lightning conductor.
I, Straits, am the successor and Lama to the 4,000-year-old Art of Mystics.
You cannot hope to defeat one who knows everything there is to know about the Ripple!
That is why Dio died!
And what a jolly good advert that was.
But what makes you think that I'd limit myself to using the Ripple against you?
Unlike you, I'm quick on the uptake!
When and how did you attach a grenade to my muffler?!
A pathetic parlor trick!
You really could learn something new from seeing the world!
Take a good gander at that grenade you just pulled!
Impossible!
H-He's a goner now!
H-How could he still...
Smokey, don't look at 'im!
Too late!
Lord have mercy!
Have mercy on my soul, for I shall do no wrong from this day forward, every day!
Lordy-lord, have mercy on us all!
H-He's a monster...
H-Hey Jojo, you got anything else up your sleeves?
I do, indeed.
You do?
Yes, and it's my backup plan.
S-So, what are you gonna do then?
It's a relatively simple plan.
Look at his legs.
They've been blown to bits, but he's slowly building 'em up again.
His recovery will take time.
So, what's your simple plan?
We're gonna use our legs!
And do what, exactly?
We're gonna skedaddle on outta here, Smokey!
Clear the road, rubbernecks!
That wack's really wacky!
Pursue me, Straits!
Hold up, Jojo!
Though immortal, being blasted to bits takes a toll on the body,
and requires a massive amount of energy for regeneration...!
This'll be great for the tabloids!
The more pix I have, the more money I'll make!
Lucky me!
I'll be a real reporter in no time!
His digits can exert pressure of up to 235 kg/cm^2!
He can reach a height of up to 4.22 meters!
I-Is there something behind me?
We should be safe from him now...
I doubt that, Smokey.
Can't you hear it?
What's to hear, besides the running of the good ol' Hudson?
Not the Hudson,
but him!
S-Save me!
He found us!
We gotta run!
This woman is my hostage!
If you attempt to flee, I'll kill her!
But if you can rise to the occasion, I'll release her!
You're pulling me leg here!
Why would I risk my arse for some broad, you bozo?!
Jojo, we gotta go!
I present a trial to you!
If you flee and leave the woman to my mercy, then you are nothing more than a coward!
No longer shall I pursue you, for that blast has left me debilitated and fatigued,
but I will never acknowledge you as Speedwagon's avenger.
However, should you choose to face me, then I shall acknowledge your courage!
You will become a great threat to my very existence.
But before your talent manifests, I shall exhaust every ounce of my energy into killing you!
You have five seconds before her head flies!
Make those five seconds count!
If I had a sweetheart for you to take, I'd bust your bozo butt,
but instead, you picked a no-name hideous homegirl for a hostage!
Then you wouldn't mind if I destroy her jaw and tear out her throat,
while pulling out every organ inside her body as she still breathes.
I doubt proud the successor and Lama to the Art of Mystics
would commit such cruelty against a woman...
Th-That's her wisdom tooth!
Hot damn, he pulled out her wisdom tooth!
You son of a bitch!
You really pulled out her tooth!
I shall show no mercy!
Screw you...
Straits!
You asked for it!
You're nothing but a vicious vampire now!
And you're an atrocious actor, but I knew you were easy to enrage.
I'll slash you down to size, Straits!
Die!
I just figured out a way to beat those beams!
You nicked me the second time, but you won't catch me off guard the third!
Rippled!
Wha-!
Tha-!
"That's impossible," is it?
That's impossible!
I deflected your bloody beams with Rippled shot glasses,
because I knew you couldn't resist blasting my brain.
Your pattern's just too plain!
I want you to beg for Great-Uncle Speedwagon's forgiveness in Hell!
You can rest easy starting tonight, Nanna.
Why did you halt my descent?
For all you know, I might have the strength to take that right arm of yours off!
Then do it, for chrissake!
Just know that if you do, I'll bash your skull in with ol' Lefty here!
Answer me this.
Why would you toss Great-Uncle's corpse into the river?!
It just doesn't add up to me!
Joseph...
You really have inherited Jonathan's every trait.
Unlike Jonathan, you are impulsive and easy to enrage,
but you possess his penchant for adventuring and meticulous meddling!
I shall sate your curiosity and reveal the events that you have now been entangled in!
What "events?"
They shall unfold in good time.
Beginning with the Man in the Pillar!
He'll be the one to change your ways!
Could you be any more ambiguous, you damn bozo?!
I let their bodies be carried by the river because of him.
He began sucking the blood of the men I killed,
alike a tree intaking its nutrients from the soil.
This sight unsettled me...
which is why I discarded their bodies in the river.
But I'm certain his awakening is close at hand!
His awakening from two long millenia of sleep!
Joseph...
You shall encounter him soon,
and he shall be the one to change your views on man's very existence and evolution!
Once you know what he is, you'll understand the machinations of our maker.
I-Is that the Ripple?!
You've channeled the Ripple within your very body?!
I regret nothing.
Brief as this was, I am content with descending into the depths of Hell in my youth,
rather than wither away as an elder.
Regaining my youth was the greatest ecstasy I could've ever hoped for.
Wait, Straits!
I'm not finished yet!
Farewell, Jojo!
Jojo...
In 1938,
the world would be torn asunder with the advent of World War II.
The ambitions of the Third Reich ran rampant throughout the war.
They brought the most technological advancements in Chemistry, Astrology, Sorcery,
Alchemy, the Paranormal, and the Occult, all into the war!
They mastered every existing academic discipline known to man, and waged war against the world.
Even Straits actions
Mexico
were no secret from the intelligence they gathered at their base in Mexico.
F-Forgive my slip, Mayor Stroheim!
I-I just lost control over my hand!
Lick it.
You cut my cheek, ja?
Lick my cheek, and everything will be wunderbar.
Okey!
Be slow and steady with your tongue.
Be gentle, Fräulein.
Be steady...
because I can't feel any pain now.
Be careful now!
It's very sharp, ja!
Excuse me, Sturmbannführer Stroheim!
The injured old man we rescued from the Rio Grande has regained consciousness!
We can begin extracting information from him immediately!
Hey, give me a sign.
What's your name, Toots?
I could give you a lift home if you need.
What was that for?!
You called me a "hideous homegirl," didn't you?!
Well consider that punch payback, you big ham!
Did I really?
Indeedy-do.
You were rippin' that fool for taking a no-name hideous homegirl hostage.
Really?
Golly gee whiz,
how could I ever call a such a sexy sweetie hideous?
Maybe a little pain will help you remember your words, Jagoff!
You busty bitch!
Now that she's not numb from fear, she's screaming in agony.
And I'm concerned about that "Man in the Pillar" Straits was singing about.
Make way for me, Mexico!
How do you fare, Herr Speedwagon?
Tell me if you've ever heard of this European aphorism before.
"When an elder takes his own life, his village shall soon be doomed."
Perhaps the elder took an unspeakable secret with him, as you had attempted.
Does that secret concern him?!
We excavated the pillar from the location of those ruins that we extracted from you.
O Father in Heaven!
Why do I not recall the events that he speaks of?!
Why didn't you leave me at Death's Door?!
It was not by His hand, Herr Speedwagon.
I was the one who saved you from Death's Door,
and it was the military might of the Third Reich that coerced your revelation!
Though you are elderly, we know that even under interrogation, you would never break your silence.
You crossed the Atlantic a penniless pauper,
and as you slowly starved in the deserts of Texas, you chanced upon crude oil.
Now, your very foundation may alter the course of any economy in the world.
But that pales in comparison to the medical advancements of the Third Reich!
Our ambition shall overcome all!
You used a truth serum!
But what else is there to gain from me?!
We need to know everything!
Everything that you know!
Everything that transpired in your past
between Straits and the Joestars!
Anything we can use to awaken the Man in the Pillar!
D-Don't!
You don't know what you're getting yourself into!
He's a greater threat than that of the Third Reich!
Prepare the subject's chamber for massive blood injections!
This experiment must succeed!
No quiero morir!
Líbrame!
I have a suggestion.
Everybody must collectively determine a sacrifice.
We require blood for our experiments,
and if one must die, then let it be the one that you all choose.
Once everyone's decided, you'll all be freed today.
I-I will be your sacrifice!
If I die, at least the others will be free!
Very well, boy.
I commend courageous boys with bravery as big as yours, ja?
Only the brave may live to serve the Third Reich.
Spare the boy and execute the others!
Commence the experiment!
I'll be the round about
The words will make you out 'n' out
I'll spend the day your way......
Call it morning driving through the sound and
In and out the valley......
The muses dance and sing
They make the children really ring
I'll spend the day your way
Call it morning driving through the sound and
In and out the valley.....
In and around the lake
Mountains come out of the sky
and they stand there
One mile over we'll be there and we'll see you
Ten true summers we'll be there and
Laughing too
Twenty four before my love you'll see I'll be
There with you
Next Time
Your ignorance will cost you your life!
I've brought a yank for your cells.
Was it you...
who dare disturb my slumber?
He's going into the ventilation shaft?!
Episode
The Man in the Pillar